Jay Chou and Bucket of Cows

I was recently introduced to Babel Fish, the AltaVista translator that has this incredible ability to turn anything random and stupid written in non-English into something poetic in English. For example:

今晚月亮好圓

Tonight moon good circle

Rosa's translation: The moon is round tonight

我看他不爽

I thought he is feeling well

Rosa's translation: That guy bugs me

有什麼不妥 有話就直說
別窩在角落 不爽就反駁
到底跩什麼 懂不懂籃球
有種不要走 三對三鬥牛

Has any not ready to have the speech to speak frankly
other nest to be feeling well in the quoin
on retort 跩 any cannot understand the basketball
to have plants do not have to walk three pairs of three bucket of cows


This is an excerp from Jay Chou's song which I am not going to translate. Although I should make it a point that the song is about basketball, not bucket of cows....however close.

How about something actually poetic:

一曲新詞酒一盃。去年天氣舊亭臺。夕陽西下幾時迴。
無可奈何花落去，似曾相識燕歸來。小園香徑獨徘徊。

A Qu Hsintz'u a liquor cup. Last year weather old pavilion. When west the setting sun under returns. Has no alternative the flower to fall, seems to have met before the swallow return. The small garden fragrant diameter alone paces back and forth.

Rosa's translation: This is a beautiful ancient Chinese poem written by an once Prime Minister in the Song Dynasty. So...forget it. No way am I ever going to be able to translate this one. Besides, you mean you don't get it from Babel Fish?